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Atlas (The Weight of the World)

by Meganne Stepka

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about

Atlas was written during a period of grief. I struggled with feeling guilty for grieving, thinking of how others have it worse. I often do this, it can help take the edge off pain, but I also know that to grow, we need to feel everything and allow it to be a part of us. I stumbled into the concept of writing this song within the first two lines. I had written down "I'm not ok" which felt true as I wrote it, and yet I immediately followed that thought with the next that popped into my mind, that clearly came from an inner voice to discredit and disallow my experience "I'm aware that's a lie" ... So the third line that follows sought to resolve these two conflicting realities I was struggling with....as I wrote "relative truth, a different lens bends your view of time." Realizing for the millionth time in my life it's ok to not be ok, even if your "not ok" isn't as bad as someone else's. The truest truth is we are all struggling at some point, and when we hurt, it is ok to remember that others hurt too, but that is no excuse to discredit, bury or run away from what you're struggling with; to sit with our emotions is wisdom. Atlas is about recognizing that we all carry our worlds around on our backs every where we go, every thought, reaction, emotion, that we have- is just our world; and it can be heavy - it's ok to feel it. To pretend otherwise is a fool's game. I believe that to act like you don't hurt, don't care, don't feel the weight of the world only delays and compounds suffering, makes it come up in ways that you can't control, the energy has to go somewhere; and yet I often have to remind myself, it's ok, to not be ok.

lyrics

I'm not ok I'm aware that's a lie, relative truth
A different lens bends your view of time, a distant light
A darkness from within oh they put it there, to sink or swim
The weight of the world burns behind everyone's eyes
It's just a matter of how far back beneath the disguise
We wrap ourselves in comfortable truth
And lose ourselves in that too
If you live on the edge there's no thought of what if, but in the warmest beds
In the suburbs the thoughts, circling her head
Keeping us awake but not awoken
The weight of the world burns behind everyone's eyes
It's just a matter of how far back buried beneath the disguise
We wrap ourselves in comfortable lies
And lose ourselves in them
You knew this all before
Do you remember?
Feeling everything, what's keeping you awake
I'm not ok I'm aware it's ok
I'm aware there is no game but the one we play, with what's keeping us awake
You knew this all before
Do you remember?
Feeling everything, what's keeping you awake, feeling nothing
Do you remember?
It's too much

credits

released October 7, 2022
Music/Lyrics/Art by Meganne Stepka

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about

Meganne Stepka Cleveland, Ohio

– a Seeker of Truth and a Keeper of the Spark.

Meganne Stepka is a multimedia artist with a long history of creating and producing art of all kinds.  Heavily grounded in music, Meganne performs as a solo artist and as a full band (Meg & the Magnetosphere), crafting avant garde folk music and psychedelic rock. ... more

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